I'm Proud of you

In the past ten years I've learned a new skill. It requires use at a very precise moment where it always has the most impact. This skill, that I share with my valued friends and mostly loving family is telling them how proud I am.

A quick google search will show that pride (noun) is a feeling of deep pleasure or satisfaction derived from one's own achievements, the achievements of those whom one is closely associated, or from qualities or possessions that are widely admired. Now, if you sprinkle a little bit of Sasha Flores on it. We would drop the "widely admired" part and in its place have "widely taken for granted".

I've found that the most meaningful moments when I have shared my pride and love have been for qualities that the world deems as an expectation. Since I like lessons, we will use the very real fact of motherhood. The ultimate thankless job. It has no days off, no holidays, you must work weekends, and the healthcare sucks. You always work your sick days and your yearly review is a holiday that you share with every other person with the same title as you.

I am not saying that being a mom sucks. I'm just saying that being a mother is one tough job. The kudos are often few and you have to wait until your kids are grown to see the fruits of your labor. When I was a teen, I only thanked my mother for her bail outs and then went back to my crazy ways. I would argue not much has changed in today's world.

So, I make it a point to make the to say that I am proud of you. To take the moments to share with the "moms" in my life how me and their families couldn't do it without their sacrifices. I see you - I see your struggle and I admire your perseverance, your strength. I take note of your courage to continue when you just don't feel like it and you make me better just by being who you are.

This ability to say that your proud goes beyond thanking your mom, your bonus-mom, adopted moms, or family/friends who are moms. The ability to express your pride crosses into all avenues of life. I am proud of my boss for being open to new ideas in a closed minded world. I am proud of my co-worker for trusting me as a safe place to share vulnerability. I am proud of my friend for picking up an extra job to buy a house.

It's time that being proud of someone becomes a part of every day culture. That we rewrite the norms and become better people for our loved ones and just better humans. It's time that we become proud of ourselves. Today, I looked in the mirror and told myself that I am proud of you. It took you a while to get here but you are amazing. I hope that anyone who reads this can pay it forward.